Just when I think I can't take it anymore and I start thinking about getting a job outside the home, something happens. The girls may say something to me or I'll hear something on the radio, tv, or from a friend. They unknowingly give me my answer. First of all, we should never make decisions when we're frustrated! If I did that, there's no telling what I'd do!
The fact is, God wants me here. I just wish he'd send me an assistant! This parenting thing takes every ounce of me nearly every day. It's not just the laundry (and there is a ton with 2 girls who change clothes all the time), the cleaning, and the meals. It is the emotional raising of children. Learning to keep our own reactions in check when dealing with theirs. If you think having a preschooler is tough (and it is!), just wait. It may get easier some ways, but it will get more challenging in other areas as they mature. The key is to be ready for anything!
So, for the SECOND time this week (yes, I just "yelled" that) I will be driving nearly 8 miles into town to drop off Natalie's forgotten lunch. (angry sigh) Oh, that girl and her forgetfulness. Times like these make me have to work at remembering her positives! I don't want to be frustrated with her and critical of her forgetfulness and her weird reactions. (I'm guessing it's a hormone thing, who knows) I am her mom! I am supposed to be helping her, encouraging her, guiding her, and being patient! She is so smart and loving, wicked funny, creative, and an instant friend to anyone she comes into contact with. Her shyness drives me crazy only because I went through it as a child. Well, I have to remember, "she" is not "me" and her outcome will be much better than mine for sure. Especially if I keep my trap shut about it! I love that she is not mouthy and disrespectful, of course, only to her sister, which gets her in trouble. But overall, she is a good kid and I am super proud of the girl she is and will be. She's not perfect, and no child is, but I am pretty fortunate that the issues I have with her are so very minor.
Remembering the positives in our kids is like finding the positives in a negative day. It works the same. It softens our attitude toward them, and makes for a whole lot better outcome. I could easily blast her for causing me to come into town yet again today, but I will show her mercy today. God shows mercy to me every time I make a stupid mistake, so why not do it for my own kids? Don't think I'm super mom for doing this. I threw the fit first. :) Now I'm over it, and I will do the right thing.
I still say that being a mom is a calling, not a job, and there is nothing more important on this earth than what I'm doing already. I depend on God daily...no, make that minute by minute, and second by second, to help me raise these girls. I am thankful that Steve is the kind of dad who is "hands on", and listens to my daily reports so he knows what to expect from them. Being a united (I almost typed "untied" HA HA) front is so important to kids and to a healthy marriage! !
Will we make mistakes? Sadly, yes. Every good plan has a few glitches in it. We're not perfect parents and the sooner our kids understand that, the better!
Be blessed, and hug and kiss your little (and big) stinkers today. Tell them you love them no matter how many times they forget something or spill diet pepsi all over the floor before school...... Give them mercy if it's possible and give yourself a break now and then!!
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3 comments:
Jami,
I know that I've said this before, but I just love reading your writings. You always make me feel like I'm right in this with you!
I don't have children, so I can not relate to many of your trials and excitements...but, I love getting a glimpse into your life!
Thank you for that!
Jami,
I'm so glad to have you as a friend! Especially because when my girls get to be the age your girls are now I'm really going to need someone with experience...and wisdom! And I have a feeling it's getting pretty close. Thank you for reminding me that I need to show mercy to my kids just as God does for me EVERY single day. And also for reminding me to find the positives about them...especially during the hardest trials. I love you girl. Thank you for sharing!!!
Jenn
Jami...it only gets better (in the good way). Your consistancy, constancy and lovingkindness now will reap the rewards later. This is true. Maybe the rewards don't come as quick or as prolific as we may hope, but they do come and it is all the sweeter for the labor we have invested. Al and I have been abundantly blessed in the children He chose to gift us with. You are wise to be a good steward of such a precious gift. Only yesterday I had contact with both of our children and they both warmed my heart more than I can say. Parenting is the most exhausting thing I have ever done. Partenting is also the most rewarding thing I have ever done. Keep on keeping on. Like they say... it is a marathon, not a sprint.
Keep writing,
Colleen
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