Much to Say

Spring is sort of making it's way here in the way of birds singing and snow melting, but I find myself a little stuck in winter still. 

I have that feeling of having so much on my mind that I have everything and nothing to say. I am in that space of wanting spring to come, but resenting life for going on. A bit confusing. 

It's kind of like thinking you are lonely so you spend time with people only to leave feeling more alone. Ironic, isn't it? 

It's enjoying beautiful music, but not listening to the words, because that's where the song really hits you. 

It's living halfway. 

Looking like yourself to everyone else, but you know...

And it's never just about your loss. It's about the other "stuff" too. And there is so much "stuff" that you can't deal with just one thing at a time. 

So you get so much on your mind that you have everything and nothing to say. 

So I'm quiet, but I have much to say. I just can't say it yet.