The One To Trust

 In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength... 

Isaiah 30:12

How easy is it to be quiet when going through a struggle? How peaceful do we feel when a lot of chaotic things are going on and we feel like we can't get a grasp on anything? And yet the Lord tells us we will find salvation and strength when we get quiet and trust Him. We don't really do quiet very well, do we? I think some of us are convinced that loud and messy gets us what we want, as evidenced by the many customer service people quitting their jobs. And it's not just when we are being "loud and messy," but sometimes life is just full of "to-do" lists and events and surprises, and it's hard to prioritize, slow down, and find the peace we all need. 

And how much do we believe that repentance and rest really work, when more work and more pushing is what we are told makes us stronger? We are encouraged not to be quitters! Stay "positive"! Of course, we must never give up, but if the answer lies in seeking God's refuge and security, then those things require being quiet. After all, can we even hear the voice of the Lord when we're too busy hearing other voices all the time? Many well-intentioned people will jump to our aid, but only God truly knows us and what we need, and He is there, ready to listen. 

If we can't turn to God with the little things in our lives, how can we trust Him for the big things that are sure to come? Isaiah 30:19 How gracious he will be when you cry for help! As soon as he hears, he will answer you. That is some pretty fast customer service, if you ask me. As soon as you cry for help, He will answer, and answer with grace. That is the kind of trust we can have with Him, and it is the kind of trust we can depend on. Think of your relationships. The ones you trust should give you strength. They may not always come with God's grace. But when we come to know God as One with whom we can have a relationship, we can also know Him as someone we can turn to at any time. Philippians 4:19 And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. 

Isaiah 30:20 Although the Lord gives you the bread of adversity and the water of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. God allows hard times in our lives, but He won't leave us without help to guide us through those hard times. If we submit to the lessons He is showing us through the hardship, we will see the purpose of them in our lives. It doesn't matter whether we are looking for a lost key, trying to find a new job, or praying about a serious issue. Everything we go through matters to God and He will show us His love and guidance all the way through. Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. 

It is normal and human to want to fight against trials and tribulations. I remember going into labor for my first daughter, Natalie, and it was going on 24 grueling hours, and the nurse had been saying to me, "You need to stop fighting the labor pains." I didn't realize I had been doing that. I wasn't allowing the labor pains to do their job to bring Natalie into the world. I was fighting something good coming into my life, without even realizing it. I was so used to fighting bad pain from having chronic and debilitating migraines, that it was just an instinct to bear up under any kind of pain and not allow it to take over my body. In this instance, the pain was necessary. That realization was life-changing in many ways. How many other things was I fighting against that were put there to bring good into my life? Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Sometimes we let our fears and our self-protection stand in the way of what God is trying to do. Quiet, trusting, repentant. This is the way to receive our strength from the Lord. 

Not all pain and change is negative, but at first it will seem that way. It's not fun to be uncomfortable in any way at all. We don't always want to welcome bad news or a dose of the truth, but when we know we can turn to God with it, we can handle anything that comes our way. Isaiah 30:21 Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it." We are assured that no matter what we are facing–a small annoying trial, new changes, or a big mountainous issue–God is providing the instruction, the direction, and His salvation and strength, and we can rest in that. 

My soul finds rest in God alone; 

my salvation comes from him. 

He alone is my rock and my salvation;

he is my fortress, I will never be shaken. 

Psalm 62:1

Ruth and Naomi: A Never Ending Story

 But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me." 

Ruth 1:16-17

This is a story about loyalty. Spoiler alert: The kind of true devotion that would one day bring about the birth of David, and the eventual birth of Jesus, the Messiah. How's that for a plot twist?? I should back up a bit and mention that the loyalty being professed here is that of  daughter-in-law, Ruth to her mother-in-law, Naomi. In the world today, that type of undying allegiance would be unheard of in most cases. Mother-in-law jokes are just as common as "dad jokes." As I'm preparing to become a mother-in-law for the first time in a few short months, I could either one day become the target of these types of jokes, or I could lean in to my new title and be a Naomi. I pray for the latter example. But that will take some devotion of my own. 

Naomi had been through some hard things of her own in life, just like many of us. There was a famine in the land, which was not her own country, nor culture. Her husband passed away, and then she lost both of her sons. Understandably, she became upset and frustrated with the tragedy that had occurred in her life and exclaimed to her widowed daughters-in law in Ruth 1:13, "It is more bitter for me than for you, because the LORD's hand has gone out against me!" Meaning, they would be able to go on to remarry, but because she didn't know of any men left in her husband's family to care for her, she felt abandoned. 

When she decides to go back to her own home country of Judah, she lovingly tells her two widowed daughters-in-law to go back to their own homelands to be with their mothers. One would decide to go, but Ruth refused. It is here when she declares her undying loyalty to Naomi and makes her way with her mother-in-law to Bethlehem. Yes, that Bethlehem.

Naomi wasn't quite done being bitter over what had happened in her life, even though Ruth had shown this unprecedented devotion to her. She was still focused on what had been taken from her, and this is something we are all at risk of doing when we focus on our disappointments in life rather than the love the Lord provides. We can easily overlook our resources and our blessings when we are too focused on all the hardships that have befallen us. Naomi even wanted to change her name. Her name, "Naomi" held the meaning, "sweet," but when people greeted her as such, she answered, Ruth 1:20 "Don't call me Naomi," she told them. "Call me Mara, because the Almighty has made my life very bitter. I went away full, but the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The LORD has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me." Oh, girl. I totally feel you. I wanted to change my name to "Mara", a time or two. (a name meaning "bitter")

I remember when I was blogging about the loss of my brother, my dad, and then my brother-in-law all within 3 years of each other, and it felt so tremendously personal. But the thing Naomi and I have in common is that we still held our faith in the Lord. We were just disappointed and hurt by the events in our lives, and we couldn't quite wrap our acceptance around them yet. That is quite human of us, isn't it? It's the part of grieving that we need to do, and it's part of the long healing process. It's okay to not be okay with what has just occurred and to take some time to see straight again. It's when we linger too long there that bitterness can take root and then our faith can suffer. Hebrews 12:15 See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. I made the mistake of complaining about my friendship void at that time, and a dear friend reminded me, "I've been here for you the whole time." Yes, in fact, that friend was as loyal as Ruth, but because I was so grief-stricken and self-focused, I couldn't see my own blessings. I could only see what I didn't have at that time. Mara, Mara, Mara.

Ruth must have seen a genuineness in Naomi's faith, even through her bitter tears and harsh words, because her own deeply loyal words spoke a loving and humble commitment toward her. Ruth 1:16-17 But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me. I have to be a little honest here, I'm a little intimidated by this, being a mother of my own two daughters. I would be quite lost if they chose to leave me and follow their own future mothers-in-law. This tells me that God truly had a plan for Ruth and Naomi that superseded any plan her own parents had for her, and exceeded any love there as well. When God has a plan, sometimes it doesn't make sense to our human minds, that's for sure. Isaiah 55:8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD.

The fact that Ruth said, "your God will be my God," indicates that Naomi's strong faith was what was motivating Ruth's commitment and loyalty to her, and she wanted the faith that  Naomi had. I believe that when Naomi demonstrated God's kindness toward Ruth in trying to send her home, Ruth saw God's love and kindness in that act, and chose to stay with her instead. I'm very moved when I think about what Ruth must have been going through at this time. She had lost her own husband, father-in-law, and brother-in-law too.  Ruth 1:8-10 Then Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, "Go back, each of you, to your mother's home. May the Lord show kindness to you, as you have shown to your dead and to me. May the Lord grant that each of you will find rest in the home of another husband." Then she kissed them and they wept aloud and said to her, "We will go back with you to your people." Naomi assured them that what she wanted was for them to find husbands and have children with them, and gave them her blessing. This is how Naomi showed her faith and strength in the Lord, no matter what pain she was experiencing in her life. Romans 8:35-39 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: "For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered." No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

This is how the love of God's kindness works in our relationships. When we allow people to do what they need to do, go where they need to go, and do so with our blessing, they will gravitate toward us and not away from us. This is how we motivate others to love and honor Christ–by being His example of acceptance and kindness. Naomi, by doing what she thought was best for both women, giving them God's blessing, became blessed herself with Ruth's loyalty and love. 

When Ruth began to work for Boaz, he favored her because of all she had done to take care of his relative, Naomi. He began to look out for her and give her special privileges. Not just because of her work ethic, but because she was consistently kind and faithful. Because of these qualities, he continued to bless her and ask the other workers to treat her kindly as well. We don't see much of Ruth's outward faith here, but we do see God's provision for her, as she remains faithful and humble. This is interesting to me, because it reveals more of God's plan for her and for Naomi and for the bigger picture, as I alluded to in the first sentence–the birth of David, and what that means. 

God rewarded all of Ruth's commitments, and He rewards ours too, even if we don't notice it or feel like it at the time. Sometimes it feels like we're stuck gleaning in a field and we're just tired at the end of the day instead of enjoying our harvest. We don't feel appreciated by others for the things we do, and we don't feel that what we do even matters sometimes. This may have been Naomi's position for awhile, who knows? But God was working in both of their lives, nonetheless. God's rewards come if we remain faithful to Him, keeping the eternal perspective in mind. Maybe we won't see an immediate result, but if we follow things for a Godly reason and not a self-serving one, we will see God's purpose for it come to light one day. God makes promises and He keeps them. Hebrews 13:5 "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Whether that purpose will be revealed to us here or in heaven may remain to be seen. Psalm 138:8 The LORD will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O LORD, endures forever–do not abandon the works of your hands.

Ruth marries Boaz, and because of this union, she and Naomi both enjoyed a lifetime of financial security. David was eventually born, which would lead to the eventual birth of Jesus, the Messiah. Ruth 4:14 The women said to Naomi: "Praise be to the LORD, who this day has not left you without a kinsman-redeemer. May he become famous throughout Israel! He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age. For your daughter-in-law, who loves you and who is better to you than seven sons, has given him birth." What an amazing end and beginning to this story. Who says two widows can't change the world? Who says we can't change the world when we let God into our own story? When we commit our plans to Him, they will succeed. Psalm 37:5-6 Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.

 Psalm 27:13-14 

Who Is Your Influencer?

 "Now I know I can't lose...as long as you follow...I'm gonna win...I'm gonna beg, steal, or borrow...as long as you follow. Yes, I can live today...if you give me tomorrow....As long as you follow..." 

Fleetwood Mac, As Long As You Follow (lyrics)

I'm sure Fleetwood Mac knew nothing about what influencers would mean in today's world when they wrote and performed this beautiful song, but its soulful lyrics are ironic when applied to the strategy of a modern day influencer. Some will do just about anything to get you to subscribe to whatever they are shilling. They literally bank on us clicking on their links and buying whatever they are sponsoring that week. I find it clever that Jesus has been referred to as the "OG influencer." I'm sure all the so-called "popular influencers" would be shocked to hear this, but it's true. He is the first to have actual followers. As I sat and pondered this, I looked at my Bible in a whole new way, and thought of it as a book of Influencers and followers. An influencer is simply a leader of something, and a follower is a believer of something. Hebrews 13:7-9 Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and forever. Do not be carried away by all kinds of strange teachings. 

So, who are we following and what are we believing in this world today? What are we allowing ourselves to believe and follow that is simply not true or even worthy of our time? I know there are a lot of strange teachings out there! Luke 6:39-40 He also told them this parable: "Can a blind man lead a blind man? Will they not both fall into a pit? A student is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher. Mixed in with all the good things I see on YouTube are some really toxic subjects being delivered in very enticing ways. It seems some want to diagnose other people with all kinds of things, and glorify hedonistic lifestyles. This is nothing new, but when there are so many young people in crisis looking for a quick fix, it's terrifying to think of the things they latch on to for strength and a sense of belonging. Sadly, I don't think it's restricted to just the young people anymore. Anyone can be influenced. This is why we need to know the Word of God and to be able to test what we hear against it. 1 John 4:1 Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world. 

We need to be careful that we are not following the wrong things. Some of those wrong things aren't just other people, but they can also be our own traps we set when we follow our feelings instead of the truth. Are our feelings valid? Yes, but they are only an indicator of what is happening. We cannot rely on our feelings or place our confidence on the opinions and judgments (perceived or real) of others, because others often respond with their own fickle feelings too. When we are able to give in to God's Truth and not our changeable feelings, we will be able to live securely and confidently in who we are, not who we may erroneously think or feel we may be. While we can be highly influenced by others, we can't overlook the influence of our own feelings on our attitudes and long-held judgments of ourselves. Psalm 139:24 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. We can invite God into our hearts and minds and ask Him to lead us to a better way of life. 

What Jesus did while He walked with the people wasn't just influencing. He walked with the people as the actual embodiment of love while teaching how to love. He gained nothing–not a huge following, no accolades, no sponsorships, and certainly not a bunch of free products. He died on a simple cross for the sins of the people He loved–us. His influence lives today through the people who live and love by His example. Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Who in our sphere of influence exemplifies the Spirit of God? When we set our own life standards by the fruit of the Spirit, we can count on God's peace, and not a constant need for the validations and approval of others. If we know people who are living a life reflective of the Lord, these are people we can look to as mentors. These are people who will influence and encourage us in our walk with the Lord. Proverbs 27:17 As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. 

The longer and deeper we ruminate on our issues and feelings, the more access the enemy has to us, and the deeper we can become stuck in a holding pattern of unrest. Psalm 105:4 Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always. Something I have had to tell myself is that I can feel uncertain, but I can still BE stable because I'm trusting the Lord for the outcome. Feelings are allowed to come and go, as we are human, but they do not always indicate truth, and they do not define who I am as a person.  When we apply God's truth to any situation, it washes away the filth of deception. We can allow God to be the influence over every aspect of our lives, whether it is a relationship issue, a work situation, a personal growth issue, health concern...anything. 

 The first step is to desire to live a life led by God and not one being influenced by our own self-defeating thoughts or the world-led solutions of others. Once we decide to let God be the main source of strength in our lives, we have to be willing to change old habits and do something different. This often means stepping out in faith and leaving comfort zones. "Many a great Christian was molded in character in the crucible of suffering, matured in loneliness, and prepared for greater usefulness in God's hands than if untouched by the storms of life." John F. Walvoord  Once we have desired change and are willing to change, we then need to be actively moved by the Word of God as we keep it at the forefront of our daily lives. Permanent changes happen when we decide we are tired of not getting a desired result and we do something different. Ephesians 4:22-24 You were taught, with regard to your former way of life to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. 

I thought of something as I gained speed to enter the expressway the other day. People don't have to get over to let me on. It's nice when they do, and it's a great courtesy to me if I don't have to adjust my speed at all. Sometimes I hop on and I get behind a slow semi and I'm trying to get over to pass it, and the vehicle behind me must notice this, but can't give me the courtesy, so it hurries to pass me AND the semi, leaving me to have to slow down before I can get over. Yeah, I may have expressed a little displeasure at that frustrating moment. It's also a very enjoyable ride home when I seemingly have the expressway to myself and I don't have to be concerned about anyone else's actions. One day there was a median fire that had just begun, and I reasoned, "well, the road can't burn, so we're fine," and I kept going, knowing help was on the way. Navigating the road of life with people is much like this. We sometimes can depend on other people, but most of the time we need to be responsible for ourselves and our own feelings and actions. We can't worry about what other people are doing and thinking all the time. We can only be concerned about our own responses and reactions to them. No one else can move me but me. If I'm feeling a certain way, that is my feeling to figure out. If I'm in need of something, it is on me to express that. It is not for other people to notice and give me what I need. We are responsible and accountable for navigating our own roads and adjusting our own speeds, but we cannot expect others to adjust and navigate theirs to accommodate us. It's nice when they do and it's a great courtesy. When we are operating in the fruit of the Spirit, we don't need to others to give us what only we and God know we need. Grace is the balm that fills in the gap when someone gives what we don't expect, or we give ourselves room to enter the lane at our own speed. 

Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. 

Ephesians 5:12 

Assume Only This

Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in awhile, or the light won't come in. 

-Isaac Asimov 

 I heard a story around our Easter dinner table that allowed me to share what I felt to be an important lesson. My "lesson" was only a few sentences at the table, in case you were wondering. I'm not a dinner table preacher, at least I hope not. A young man we know living in his new neighborhood was outside his home when a neighbor walked by and scolded, "You guys need to mow your lawn," and kept on going. This wonderful young man has been a friend to our family for many years, and in his usual gentle manner, just took the blunt reprimand with a nod. Not that it matters, but he's not living in a strict neighborhood with those rigid HOA codes and restrictions, and his lawn wasn't too terribly overgrown, but he was aware that it was time to get it mowed. I didn't ask my daughter what the circumstances were, because that wasn't really the point. 

Overcome with a motherly protection toward this young man I've always particularly favored, I spoke up and made my usual comments fired by the injustice I was feeling.  I wish we could use the magic of television sometimes to re-do scenes in life. Add that record scratch noise, see people moving backward, and starting over. Not just in these situations, but in some of my own. For this particular situation, my second-take scene would have gone down like this: 

Our family friend would have been out in his yard when the man was approaching, and instead of being offended by the long grass, the man would have noticed that he has a new neighbor– a tall, bright-eyed, and friendly looking young man. He would have introduced himself and then been blessed by how wonderful, kind, and personable this young man is, and what a positive contribution he is to the neighborhood.  He may have then been compelled to say, "Hey, if you ever need a hand with anything, let me know. I'm right down the street. Here is my number." (This was my basic thought spoken at the table–hey, instead of assuming, why don't you offer your assistance?) Maybe then he could show who he is as part of a helpful  community, and not a shamer and blamer, finger-pointing at a situation he shouldn't  need to understand in order to be of human service. Men, please guide the younger men if what you want to see in this world is a better generation of you.  If all you're doing is going around huffing and puffing and pointing your bony fingers at them, you've already lost them. Titus 2:6-8 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching, show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing to say about us. 

We don't know what's going on inside a person's home, their yard, or their lives at any given time. People get sick, they take care of loved ones or sick animals.  They have depression, anxiety, work long hours, or their lawn mowers break down and they can't afford to fix them or buy a new one. When all we do is assume someone is too lazy to mow their lawn, we are treating people as we see them, and not for who they really are. We forget sometimes that God uses us to bless people, and when we are in a position of judging and scoffing, we can't be used for a place of blessing. We start seeing people as other obstacles instead of God-designed people who deserve compassion and kindness. 

What is it with those who are always "assuming the worst?" Are they doomed to be naysayers and negative about everything? Don't they also need compassion and kindness? I'd say the most ornery people probably need it the most! Matthew 7:12 So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Now, maybe the older gentleman wasn't scoffing at all, or he was just having a bad day at home. Maybe our young man's kindness of not saying anything rude back to him taught him something. We may never know. We really don't know the truth of anything. We assume without even getting more information. 

That's what assumptions do. Assumptions are dangerous and can really set us up to become very unkind and unhappy people. Ecclesiastes 10:13 Fools base their thoughts on foolish assumptions, so their conclusions will be wicked madness; they chatter on and on. When we look at someone's situation and assume we know something about it based on the little information we have, we reveal our own self-righteousness, pride, and bitterness. Such as it is with gossip. Gossip is nothing but malicious assumptions, and look where that leads. Someone begins to spread something about someone else, it gets repeated, and its sole purpose is for what? There is no healthy or Godly purpose for it! Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Repeating or starting gossip serves no holy or redeemable purpose for anyone else. I don't care what we heard down at the local coffee shop. Disguised as "concern" or a "prayer request" does not dismiss the fact that information is being shared about a person who is not in the room. Proverbs 20:19 A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid anyone who talks too much. When we turn to gossip and slander, we're showing people we can't be trusted with the things we share, and that we aren't concerned with building people up, but instead tearing them down. 

Psalm 101:5 Whoever slanders his neighbor in secret, him will I put in silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, him will I not endure. We need to make sure that what we are sharing and the actions we take are honoring to God and His Word. We can always assume that God's way is the right way, but that's the only assumption that won't get us into some kind of trouble. Mark Twain said, "It is wiser to find out than to suppose." Wisdom takes a back seat when we assume we know better than everyone in the room. When we assume everyone thinks like us, and if they don't, they must be wrong. When we assume we're the only ones who know how to do anything right. When we assume we understand something when clearly we don't. When we assume anything as truth before we even ask! In other words, when we start standing in our foolish pride. When we fail to look for facts or communicate, we run a risk of believing all kinds of useless things. Even assuming the Bible says something that it doesn't say is wrong. One of my favorite pastors was my favorite because he taught us to always test what we were hearing against what is in the Word of God. We should apply this truth to everything we hear. 

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:9-10

The Bible tells us not to make assumptions, because it can lead to sin. When we are assuming, we are making judgments about others. How many posts have we all seen on social media, shaming someone for parking in a disabled parking place when they don't "seem" disabled? Or reacting harshly to a headline before even reading the whole story? We are living in a world chock full of assumptions–just watch the news or read the paper, scroll your social media. Everything has some kind of assumption built in by whoever is speaking or writing. We are commanded to honor others above ourselves, which does not include believing the worst of them or discussing their personal lives with other people. If we are willing to act in such a careless way with people, how then will we act with Jesus? We can't treat people with thoughtlessness, disdain and disregard, or even favoritism, and then think our relationship with or our worship of God is honest, pure, and true. Leviticus 19:15 "Do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great, but judge your neighbor fairly. 

Assumptions can go in several different directions, can't they? We assume because we see a person in a trusted position doing or saying a certain thing, they must be elevated. Recent headlines in my community have revealed otherwise. We must never put our blind faith in human beings and assume they are without the ability to sin. If we assume anything, we can assume God's power, truth, perfection, and sovereignty over our lives. 1 Chronicles 29:11-13  Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all. Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all. Now, our God, we give you thanks, and praise your glorious name. This is the prayer of David, who put his trust in the Lord, and not in the fleeing nature of the world. 

Making assumptions about people seems like the easy way out. If assumptions are made, the whole recommended "walk a mile in someone else's shoes" can be avoided. We can stick our noses up right past that long grass and assume people are just lazy, young, entitled, and don't care about anything. But if we really get to the root of that thinking, is that really the easiest way out? Judging people is a full time, fruitless job. Thinking the worst of people is baggage-hauling, ick producing, wrinkle-inducing, painstaking, heartbreaking labor. Matthew 7: 1-3 Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the same measure you use, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? We are humans, made of fickle flesh. Oh, we have a tendency to judge, and some are even proud of it. There are TV shows on every channel with high ratings because of it. People are proud to say, "I can say whatever I want! I can do whatever I want!" Yes, we sure can. Galatians 5:16-17 So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want. We can also suffer the consequences, and many do and will. But this is not going to get us to a place where we can serve God or others or fulfill God's purpose for our lives. Micah 6:8 He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. 

 Judging is a position best left for God to fill, and we can spend our time learning how to love people as He does. Philippians 2:3-4 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.  When I wrote a few weeks ago about self-awareness, this is where knowing ourselves comes in. Having a true perspective about who you are–neither putting ourselves down nor over-inflating ourselves–gives us the humility needed in order to give others the proper consideration and respect that Christ requires of us. When we do this, we won't be in a position of judging or assuming, because loving others will be natural and genuine. When we are humble, we can see the plights of others as our own. We see people as God sees them, and not higher or lower than ourselves. Ephesians 4:2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 

How can we go about correcting the wrongs in our thinking and in what comes out of our mouths? Zechariah 4: 6 So he said to me, "This is the word of the LORD to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit', says the LORD Almighty. When we choose to follow the Spirit of God, we can make lasting changes in our behavior and actions. I know that my thinking on certain things requires correction when I don't have peace in my spirit. When I am angry, hurt, lashing out at situations, or making assumptions that are not fair or based on loose information. It can be a vulnerable place of attack, but we can be prepared for these times by taking these feelings and situations to the Lord right away instead of acting on them. Even when I am correct in my assumptions, I can lose my peace because I fail to apply the teaching I mention here. I instead apply my hurt feelings, and it takes me down the path of pain and rejection instead. Nothing good can come from that. 

There will be times that our assumptions are correct and our hearts will be broken. People can do things that will cause us pain, without even trying. Think of this on an even greater scale. These are times for the Lord to care for us so that we don't end up in a position to sin–as people, as members of society, as a country. When we get caught up in assumptions, we are putting our own hurt feelings above believing the best of others. When we speak poorly of them, we are not being fair and merciful toward them. This is exactly the type of situation in which the enemy thrives, and we need to be mindful that we don't slip into these types of traps. 1 Peter 5:8 Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings. 

Getting people riled up and believing the worst of each other is a tactic of the enemy to divide churches, families, friends, coworkers, and nations. The enemy would have us believing people should be against each other, seeing each other as enemies, at war with each other, and that God doesn't care about us. But none of that is truth. Genesis 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. This doesn't mean God created only some of the people in this world. He created them all. Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." He is above all nations, not just the ones we are familiar and cozy with.  Isaiah 55:9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. We may not understand what He is doing, because we can't possibly comprehend His thoughts, but we can trust that what is happening will result in His purpose, whether we agree with it or not. Again, we can safely assume only that God is in control. 

Today's prayer: Holy Father, we thank You for being our Source of strength and our constant place of peace. We know that we need to lean on You daily to keep us from falling into the traps of judgment or making unfair assumptions about the lives of others. Help us to see people the way You see them and to give people the grace You so freely give us each day. Help us to listen to Your wisdom and to love others the way You command us to love them. In Jesus' name. Amen. 

Adjusting My Expector

 "Expectations are resentments waiting to happen."-Anne Lamott 

Oops, there I went again. I set myself up for disappointment–walked right into it and kept right on going. How many times do I have to keep repeating the same scenario before I finally get to the root of why it keeps happening? Have you asked yourself this question before? If you have, you're like me, and tired of the same old trap. If you haven't, then you're one of two things–at peace, or you haven't yet discovered that your unrealistic expectations are the crux of your current disappointments. Maybe even the "realistic" expectations are hitting in an odd way too, if there is such a thing. Should we have any expectations of others at all? How does this even work? We are naturally going to expect things from people, but if we learn how to manage those expectations, we don't have to be hurt every time they don't meet them in the way we think they should. Colossians 3:12-14 Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.  There are general expectations in life (I like to get my change back at the store), and there is also a certain level of thoughtful consideration that we should extend to others, at least I believe so. It's when there is no effort being made in either category that I seem to get a little out of sorts. Is it just me?

We can become disappointed when we don't get a desired outcome. When someone says or does something that is contrary to what we hoped they would say or do. When we don't get the thing we had our hopes set upon. But all of that is such a moving foundation, isn't it?  People are fickle and that includes us, because we are also "people." We can't ever predict what other people are going to do. We need to be rooted in Christ, first of all, and turn to Him for all of our needs, even those we think others can or should fill. Because if we don't, we're always going to be disappointed. Psalm 105: 4 Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. Eventually, even the best of people are going to let us down, because people cannot possibly fill every need and whim and desire we have. Even we don't know what it is we want sometimes, so how could they? But God knows, and He knows when we are disappointed by the world. He told us we would be. John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Even Jesus was disappointed by His own disciples. He expected to be betrayed, and He was. Mark 14:10 Then Judas Iscariot, one of the Twelve, went to the chief priests to betray Jesus to them. It sure didn't make it any easier knowing or any less painful, but some theologians say Judas' betrayal led to the Crucifixion and subsequent Resurrection of Christ, which is our Salvation. Maybe we can look at some of our disappointments a little differently when viewed through the lens of God. 

We are to set our minds on things higher than what is here, even higher than the people we love, which seems really hard to do sometimes. When we have our sights set on the things of the world, we see the world as children see the candy aisle–at eye level. It's all we can see. Colossians 3:2-3 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. We seem to want what is at our eye level. The love standing next to us, our kids, grandkids, friends, family, jobs, hobbies, whatever it is that brings the most immediate joy. Isn't it funny that those are the things that can also bring the most pain? The ones who walk right beside us, who we hope will always be by our side. God knows this. We hurt each other all the time with our expectations–both unreasonable and not–because we are dealing with tender human hearts. We hurt because we love, we expect because we want and need something to come from that love. But what does God expect from us? That is a question that when answered, will actually lead to the blessings we all hope for. Micah 6:8 He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. 

I wish I could tell you that I am a master of managing my expectations, and that I have complete peace at all the times when expectations run high. But that would be most inaccurate. The idealistic, fleshly optimist in me still craves the picture I painted in my head, while the Lord reminds me to remain at peace with the picture He will in time reveal. Psalm 5:3 In the morning, O LORD, you hear my voice; In the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation. Our relationship with God is an example of  healthy expectation. Isaiah 30:18 Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him! In this definition, his expectation is described as a longing for us to allow Him in. Ours is a faithful knowing that He will answer our prayers. 

I watch a woman on YouTube. She is well into her 80's, and shares her "secrets" to living a life of contentment. Though I have not heard her mention faith of any kind, one thing that stands out to me is that she doesn't "expect". When she shared her 10 steps to living joyfully, one of those steps was to let people be, and don't expect things from them, and this included her children, whom she dearly loves. At that moment, I knew I needed to wrap my head around this further, and something came to me– "When you give up your expector, you will rely on your Creator." When I give up the picture I have created in my head of how I always imagined things would be, God will replace it with a better picture, because He will show me what is GOOD, and I can trust Him. God will fill in the blanks that we think are left behind when we stop trying to create everything ourselves. 

Today's prayer: Dear Lord, Help us to manage our expectations. We all have weak spots in our minds and hearts and we know how easy it is to get hurt or to hurt others by pushing those expectations. Only You know how to help us walk through our difficult situations and answer our hardest questions, and You know the pain of our hearts when we cry out to You. Please help us to turn to You instead of other people when we have needs to fill. Help us to extend compassion and grace to those who we may be in conflict with at this moment, and help us to forgive and love one another and trust in You. In Jesus' name. Amen.