Don't Look Back....You're Not Going That Way

 But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. 

Philippians 3:13-14 

I like a song by one of my favorite bands, Tenth Avenue North. It's an older song called "You Are More". I've sent it to many friends of mine, and awhile back I sent it to someone who posted on social media, "You are what you do." This person was going through some really tough things in a relationship and some custody issues and it was getting brutal. This person was a person of faith, and I hoped by sharing the lyrics of this song I could lend some hope into whatever was happening within the situation. I've also sent it to someone having to serve time for a few outstanding warrants. I've listened to it myself over and over when needing the reminder that I am "more than the sum of my past mistakes. I am more than the problems I create. I've been remade." 

Friends, we've been remade! Thank God we are not what we "do"!  God loves us so much more than the messes we make and the dumb things we say and do.  He created us for His pleasure. He gave up his son to die for those mistakes He knew we were going to make before we even made them and for the ones we haven't even made yet. I know it seems redundant sometimes to hear this, but God does love us that much. So much that we can't even grasp it and maybe that's why some of us have such a hard time understanding His forgiveness too. 

 John 3:16 For God so LOVED the world, as to give his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him, may not perish, but may have life everlasting. 

He wants us to give Him all the messes we make, be completely repentant in our hearts for anything we've done or said to sin against Him, others, or ourselves. Once we do that, He forgives us. We are to receive that forgiveness and not repeat the sin. It's really that simple. He washes the slate clean and we start again.

For I will forgive their wickedness and I will remember their sins no more. Hebrews 8:12

The third step of that equation is that we need to then forgive ourselves, and perhaps that is the part with which some of us struggle from time to time. There are some things I know I can declare victory over, and there are still some areas I know I have to keep forgiving myself over and over again. The battlefield is in the mind and the enemy loves to remind me of every little thing I've ever said and done wrong. 

Satan delights in bringing up our old mistakes and hurting us with them. He will even use people to do his dirty work for him. You may run into an old friend or an old crowd and they may still associate you with your old behavior or past personality. You have to remain strong and remain the remade person in Christ that you are. You can't let his tricks fool you. God has forgiven you and it's time to move on. Even if people on the outside don't know the "new you". Even if people discuss you behind your back. Even if people believe the worst about you. You and God know the truth about you and that is enough. Move on and keep going forward. As the quote says, "When Satan brings up your past, remind him of his future". 

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past  Isaiah 43:18

 God gave us grace when he showed us favor and kindness when we certainly didn't deserve it. When we extend that same grace to others, we are showing God's love to them. We are saying to them, "hey, I see you and the purpose you serve. I don't see your mistakes." And what a wonderful gift it is to let someone know that you see who they are and not who they used to be. When we decide to stop doing background checks and looking in rear view mirrors, we will find there are far more productive and joyful things in our futures. 

If we are in Christ, we are not who we "used to be". We are now who Christ says we are!

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Colossians 3;12 

One of My Favorite Books

 I wasn't looking forward to Christmas this year as much as I have in previous years. Whether or not others believe there is a pandemic surging, I believe there is, and so my heart is hurting. The fact that I even have to clarify that is even sadder. Our choice to not gather together as a family was based on our belief that the spread of Covid is life-threatening to our elderly especially, and because being able to take care of our parents is important to us, we gave that up. Some people are overseas protecting our country, serving a mission, in the hospital, or in heaven for Christmas. We were at least thankful that we are all still here and healthy, and our family all agrees that it was out of love for each other that we made those hard choices this year. God will reward us for our sacrifices that we make out of love. 

In my quest for Christmas peace, I pulled out one of my favorite Christmas books of all time, "Seven Stories of Christmas Love", by Leo Buscaglia. Dr. Leo Buscaglia was an internationally known teacher, writer, and lecturer. His favorite topic was happiness and love. His life's work was teaching others how to love and encouraging others to go out in the world and love and care for others. However, I knew none of this when I picked this book up at a garage sale about 30 years ago.  I wish I could remember why I chose this book, but what I remember most about that time in my life was that I wanted to BE loved more and I loved the way I felt when I read this book. It inspired me and made me want to be more like the author. He had some kind of magic for sure. It's no wonder that his classes of 200 had waiting lists of 600. Everyone wanted what he had! It is a gifted person who loves in this way and knows how to share that with the world. 

As the book title gives away, there are seven stories in this book, but one really stands out to me. It begins with a quote,

 "In the inn of the world, there is room for everyone. To refuse entry to anyone, for whatever reason, is to risk an irreparable loss."  

To give you just a little history, Leo was born of Italian Catholic parents who immigrated from Italy to Los Angeles. He grew up in a blended neighborhood of first generation immigrants- Jewish, Italian, German, and Mexican. Few spoke English, most had large families, and many were poor. His next door neighbors were Jewish and after an awkward dinner of ravioli and kosher food (another great story!), the families became best friends for over 40 years. This took place in the 50's, and I was so surprised at the love and acceptance between these two very differing families and their customs. It was enlightening, beautiful, and maybe I cried, maybe it was the onions I was eating in bed.  Seriously, go to www.thriftbooks.com and get a copy of this book. He has many other inspiring books too. 

The story is called "No Room at the Inn".  Leo took a trip to Bali at Christmas time, and because this is one of the longer stories in the book, I will attempt to paraphrase (yes, me). As the young Balinese man showed him to his cottage, Leo mentioned that it was the day before Christmas. The young man had never heard of Christmas or Christianity for that matter, so Leo told him the story as they walked through the rain forest on the way to the cottage. The first question the man (Ratab) asked was, "But why would not the people allow Mary and Joseph to share their bed?" Leo explained that Mary and Joseph didn't know anyone, but that didn't seem to make any difference to Ratab. He insisted someone should have made room for them in their bed. Leo went on, "But they didn't know that Mary was to give birth to their God, Jesus." Again, Ratab insisted, "That is not important. If Mary was traveling, if she was going to have a baby, what matter if it were a god or not? They should have given her a place to rest." 

As the beautiful story goes on, Leo is given many more opportunities to tell the story of Jesus to the children and they were intent on every word. One night as he came back to his cottage, he was surprised by a decorated banana tree trimmed into the shape of a pine tree, lit by oil lamps. This village had been so taken by his Christmas story and wanted to give his Christmas to him. Leo was overcome with this showing of  love and he and Ratab were both in tears. He is given more opportunities to tell the Christmas story to the natives, and Ratab explains that many of the guests had asked for the honor of staying overnight. 

Ratab explained this concept of love:  "When you have made a new friend, it is bad manners to leave him." So six guests (mostly children) piled in the bed with Leo, putting him in the middle, basically cuddling him like a child would cuddle his father! Ratab also climbed in the bed, and the last thing he said to him was, "I still don't understand why they could not make room for Mary." I admit by this time I was pretty teary-eyed and made that audible "awwww" sound that makes my dog wonder what cute animal I've seen through the window. 

I have never thought of this before young Ratab made me stop and wonder this very thing! Who are we turning away because we think we don't "have room"? What foreign story are we shunning because it's too difficult for us to understand? What neighbor are we missing out on because we're so worried that they are "different" from us?  Love expands us. Hate and indifference keep  us small. You don't need me to tell you that. You'll be able to tell by the way it makes you feel. 

Blessings! 

Reflections of Change

 Welcome back if you are joining me. Grab your favorite beverage and stay awhile, because I hope together we can have a real discussion. 

This past year has changed me as a person. But if you told me you made it through 2020 unchanged, I would be shocked.  I wasn't feeling all "Happy New Year" at all as 2021 arrived, and neither was my small family as we sat together thinking about who we were missing. We have missed several holidays with our family, and the opportunities to gather with others. However, we were very aware that so many people have lost more precious things and the most important of those were the lives of family members and friends. 

 I don't remember the last time we gathered as our original family of four on a New Year's Eve, but we sat together blessed, thankful for where we are, even as questions about our futures remain. We were sad for those who mourn their lost or had no chance to say goodbye. Sad for those who are still sick, sad for those who are alone. We still have each other. We are not a perfect family, but we have a great need for each other and we love each other no matter what. There is no greater blessing than a family who loves you. I pray each one of you reading this has someone you can call family. If not, I will call you mine. 

I've missed many things in my friends' lives as they have also missed out on mine, as I found myself retreating from Facebook in May. The intensity of the constant and sometimes vicious political banter put me in a place where I just felt constant stress every time I visited my timeline. At a time when stress was already at an all time high, I chose to limit those things that invited or tempted me to react. 

I was doing okay with that until I decided to revisit my Twitter feed and found that there were a lot of political discussions there. My anger boiled over several times over many of the issues I still feel passionately about but don't have much support with over on facebook. I found more support on Twitter from strangers and suddenly my concerns were validated. For awhile that worked for me and I was able to vent my feelings and thoughts to strangers. In other words, I was reacting to things out of my control in a way that had no way of helping me, but had a short term "feel good" effect. 

If some of you have been following long enough, you've heard me say that I don't like to discuss politics with friends. This past year really changed what "discussing politics" really entails. I won't apologize for seeing things differently. I won't apologize for loving people of all races, creeds, and preferences, because I was raised to love and I believe God is love and He is the judge, not me. Some of these discussions can be had and some cannot because people have to be willing to listen and share and all of that just went out the window when the pandemic arrived. 

The element missing here is that we are not "othering" very well. We are losing our ability to tolerate others, whether they are not wearing a mask or wearing a mask, what they believe or don't believe, what they say or don't say, and on and on. We are not just polarized, we are divisive, and I could feel this happening even before it happened.  Who likes divisiveness? Satan. And what can he do when he divides people? Anything he wants. So when I see people feeding into it or believing lies, I am actually fearful for what must be going on in their minds. I'm not as angry as I am concerned that they are allowing divisiveness to rule in their minds and in their hearts. Just like it did with me on Twitter, just in a different direction.  I've been asking God for all of our hearts to change. For all of us to listen. For ALL of our eyes to be wide open. We don't have to like one another and I'm sure of that, but we do have to love one another, even when it's hard. We have to work together. If this pandemic taught us anything, it's that we as Americans have not learned that it will take all of us working together for this to end. 

 I got some of that anger out on my Twitter and those palpitations even stopped for awhile. But the bad thing about that kind of anger is it really never goes away. It just manifests into something else. I've noticed my Irish has been up a lot more than normal and my tolerance level is a lot shorter.  And if I, a reasonable person, can feel that out of control and that angry, then what can it do to someone who just doesn't check themselves at all? We've seen it if we've been watching the news media. People are losing their minds. 

God dealt with me as He always does. He told me I was better than that. He told me I was going to hurt myself and others with my words. And believe me, there are a lot worse words than mine out there. And he said to me, Stop! You were made for more than this. 

I was convicted in that moment that there was a better way to share truth. I will find a more noble, excellent, admirable, and praiseworthy way to share that truth. (Philippians 4:8). And in a time when Christians are being ridiculed and embarrassed and looked upon as being "all the same" and "fake" because of a few bad eggs, those of us who want to be an example for Christ just can't engage in negative behavior. We can't encourage others to want what we have if we're walking around angry and spewing creative insults at politicians or ranting on facebook about the other party. It's just not doing anybody any good! Nobody! The next time you want to go off on Republicans or Democrats on social media, ask yourself why you are doing that, who it is helping, and if you are part of the solution or part of the problem. It's what I am going to do and if you catch me on Twitter ranting again, call me out. 

So what is the solution if I can't vent on Twitter? Well, I've been praying a lot more, which should always be the first solution! God, this is so much bigger than I can handle. Please take this burden and carry it for me. It is breaking my heart to try to carry it all. I know God sees what is happening here and He is the only one who knows the truth, the solution, the outcome, and the reasons and purpose for it all. The best I can do for others is to be my best self, the best representation of Christ, and what I can't handle should be given to God to handle instead. No more Twitter raging. When I let it go and let God truly take it, I am free to do the things I am best at and God is going to do His thing anyway. 

Be blessed as we enter another year. This year has to be better, right? I'm believing it will be for us all. Let us approach each other with love, care, respect, and real decency. We were created for so much more than this world can ever offer.