I'm thinking of giving up this blog. Yup, you heard right. I'm not sure what the purpose of this blog is anymore. It certainly hasn't helped me to keep in touch with anyone. I'm not sure anyone is getting the message, as most of my friends don't even read it! They tell me, "oh, yeah...I forgot you had a blog." Now if that doesn't make me feel like Charlie Brown, I don't know what does. Some friends. (that's what Charlie would say) Maybe it's just me, but if I had the opportunity to get to know my long time friend a little deeper by reading their blog, I would jump on it. That's just me, I guess.
They also "forget" to email and call too! Yes, life gets busy, and family comes first, I know. But why is it the person I talk to most lives 3 hours away? That's just weird. And I am just getting started.
I try to keep in touch, I do return my calls. I e-mail more than anyone. Friends are important to me, and I'm not whining here, but I don't think I'm as important to some of them. It's just reality. I'm sure you've been there. Like the 32 times you've invited someone to do something other than a home direct sales party, and they balk. It's hard not to take it a little personally. Well, today, I'm getting personal. Deal with it. And no, I do not have extra money to go to all those direct sales parties we're all invited to. When's the last time they asked you for coffee and a chat? Oh, now I'm getting stinky! Those things are perfectly fine, they just make me feel like a checkbook. I just don't go. Sorry. I don't have them either. If you do, that's fine. Please don't send hate mail. If I invite you over, it will be to watch a movie, and I won't charge you for it. PeeeeUuuuu.
My dear friend and I talked about this the other day when she said I'm one of the few that keeps in touch with her. As she left Michigan 10 years ago, she called her friends, wrote them, and was always the one to initiate everything. She finally got tired of waiting for them to reciprocate. This is the part of friendship no one wants to talk about, but it is something people need to understand. It has nothing to do with hurt feelings or self pity. But for a relationship to work, it takes both people, not just one. A true give and take friendship really isn't that hard to manage. It is, however, very hard to find. So are diamonds in a hay stack. I have found a few of those, and they make me feel like I am their "find" too. It's not about me, I get that. It's not what I get from someone, but what I give. Yup. Got it. Friendship 101, put it on a poster. But when do you know when it's time to stop giving? Hopefully not 70 X 7 times. I'm getting too old for that.
If you want a friend, you need to be one. Yup. That's true, but sometimes you just have to be your own friend, or look for someone who truly needs and wants one! Then it will be a blessing for you both. Maybe stop trying to be friends with people who don't want a relationship with you. It doesn't need to hurt, you just need to let it go. Someone else will be along. Hopefully not the village Idiot, but then again, maybe that's me! That would explain a lot.
Well, those are my thoughts, like them or not. I happen to love Charlie Brown, so I guess if I met one, we'd be fast friends. That explains a lot too.
See ya whenever, friend.
2 comments:
First...I would soooo miss your humor, wit, honesty and insight if you quit blogging...so my vote is for you to stick around!
Second...I understand what you mean about extending your hand of friendship and getting nothing in return! I once had a "friendship" like that and it really hurt feeling like I just wasn't worth their time. Unfortunately (or probably fortunately) I quit trying. I'm sad that we don't do things anymore, but I would rather put my energy into someone who appreciates me.
Love ya girl...please don't leave the bloggy world! I truly love readying all about you..."stinky attitude" and all!!! ;)
I check your blog everyday! Actually, it really is the only way I have gotten to know you better. I love to read your thoughts and comments. I just heard Beth Moore the other day on the radio talking about friendship. She said that a lot of times we call people our friend but really they are just acquaintances. I guess I am okay with that. I don't like to tell everyone my deepest, darkest secrets but I do have a few very close friends that are more than acquaintances. I actually gave up facebook for Lent for this very reason. Too much time on the computer and not enough time with people. Technology is not always a good thing!
I am home almost everyday if you want to come have coffee with Evan and I! Love ya sister!
Jenn Dana
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