Monday, November 1, 2010

I'm A "Working Mom" Too!

Oh, I heard that famous comment the other day....someone was telling me something (so vague, but it must be this way), and I heard those words, "Yeah, but I'M a WORKING mom." Well, I wonder what that makes me??

This mom runs her kids to school and home, to practices, friend's houses, events, church functions, doctor's appointments, and the like. I don't have a babysitter, launderess, cook, gardener, personal shopper, or driver. Because I don't have an outside job, people assume I have all kinds of time to do whatever I want! I stare at the same walls pretty much all the time. I have very little interaction with friends,as they have made the choice to go to work. So, it makes for a pretty uneventful life at times. I can only do so much cooking, baking, and cleaning before I totally forget what else I enjoy doing. Right now my life is about being a wife and a mom.

We live on one income. That's a job in itself! Trying to manage raising 2 kids and give them the best of two parents means certain things are not in my vocabulary. Most of those things are anything personal, such as nice new jeans, pretty highlights in my hair, or perfume. I have tremendous guilt about buying something for myself when I know my kids need something too. My mom was the best teacher of this concept. I dressed as cute as a bug, while my mom did not most of the time. She didn't begrudge that at all. I feel bad about it, of course, but I know exactly what she means. It's not that they have to have everything, I just don't want to get it first.

Now, before the term "martyr mom" comes into your mind, that's not me. This is my choice, to work at home, raising my family and taking care of my home. When Steve travels, I am here. We make a point to put personal activities aside in order to make memories with our kids. It's not always easy to do that. But what I've learned about this choice of mine is that none of it is about me. It's all about them and what I want for them one day.

My mom regrets being a working mom. She regrets not having quality time with me. Not only was she a working mom, but she had 3 other kids,sometimes 4, and trust me, it wasn't easy for her. While money was her reason for working, I think now she has a different perspective altogether, and she is my biggest encourager to stay home and keep it up. She knows that self-worth can sometimes get lost in parenting, that some women find it at work. Some women feed off their careers and feel nothing without them. Some work to get away from the kids! Some want to drive ridiculously expensive cars, and so quitting isn't an option. Unless you put it in perspective.

So, I'm not a working mom?? Oh, yes, dearie, I AM. Just like you.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Amen, Sista!!!

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