Confessions of a Bookie

My name is Jami and I'm a book addict. Yes, that's right. It's been 2 seconds since I touched my last book. I'm not sorry that I enjoyed it. People will say to me, "Hi Jami", I will tear up and someone will give me a tissue. This is the scene of my future Book Addicts Anonymous group. Maybe you will even be there with me!
I have been reading since age 3, when my mom caught me reading the side of a milk carton. My teacher caught me under a desk in Kindergarten reading and sent me to the first grade class to read with them. I was showing signs of book addiction even as a tot! My kids are also addicted. Natalie started at 3 1/2, Serena at around 4. They didn't just read their own books. They read restaurant menus, billboards, park equipment (oh boy), catalogs, shopping lists, and even the sports page. I guess it's in the genes!
I am a regular at libraries, book stores, book fairs, garage sales (books, of course), and anywhere books can be found. You may want to lock your books up when I come to visit! Much to my parents dismay, I still have many antique books rotting in their rec room. I'll get them someday, Mom. (wink, wink)
So what do you find on a book lover's shelf? A little bit of everything, in my case. As a kid, I thought it was fun to read the encylopedia and the dictionary. I once read an entire medical dictionary. Explains the hypochondria, probably. I will read all the music lyrics on a CD insert, even though I won't remember all the words. I'm telling you, I am unstoppable! Ironically, I didn't have a ton of books as a young child, and my parents probably didn't read to me much. I believe my "addiction" truly started when I used reading as an escape from feeling fearful or upset. It sure worked in my favor.
Oh, yeah...what's on my shelves...let's see here...a Bill Bryson collection. He's the guy who chronicled his trip on the appalachian trail. Funny guy. What else...oh, I love Joyce Meyer! And that Calvin and Hobbes collection...can't get enough of that kid. I have biographies, Christian inspiration, books on wildlife and Alaska (my dream state), home decor, raising kids, marriage, diet (those books don't work, by the way!), books about tv shows, poetry, angels, gardening, cooking, and just about everything under the sun.
When I go to the local library, I keep them on their toes by checking out weird combinations of books. A book on turkey hunting, hormones, Michigan lakes, and People Magazine. Keep 'em guessing, I say. Oh, and when you're a book addict, plan on putting aside a little cash for those late fees at the library. They have my picture on the wall there now. You know, the Wall of Shame.
My friends recommended a book to me called Have a New Kid by Friday, by Dr. Kevin Leman. I'm still waiting to find out exactly which Friday he was referring to. My latest dieting book had me all excited. This is the one, I thought. This is it! Then the next time I baked brownies, I used the book to kill a spider.
I once read a book of Steve's called The Goal, which followed a factory manager, and explained all sorts of really cool sounding things called "the theory of constraint" and "bottlenecking", in relation to factory issues. I thought, hey, I can use this stuff to impress Steve. It worked,although he didn't read the book! He's not even sure why he had it! I actually thought it was pretty interesting. I also love children's picture books, especially Stranger in the Woods, and all the ones that followed. If it's well-written and illustrated, I must have it! And when the kids bring home book order forms....I just hand over the Visa.
So, books, as enlightening and entertaining as they are, are just not the cure-all for every issue. They didn't help me lose weight, travel to Alaska, or perform a surgery. What books do is wake up your mind, relax your senses, and inspire you. Did I mention I was trying to read, How to Talk to Your Child about Sex? There's no relaxing with that one, my friends, Christian version or not! It is what it is. That's all I can say.
Books connect people, too. When you're around a fellow book-lover, it's an easy conversation. I've been known to whip a book out of my purse and say, hey, wanna read this one? The guy at the stoplight was not impressed, by the way. Book stores are great places to people-watch too. Follow somebody around, discreetly, of course. Check out the books they are attracted to. Be careful of the sections you follow them into, of course. Eavesdrop on a parent reading "Everybody Poops" to a toddler, and you'll never be the same! And parents...please, please, please....read to your kids!! Use goofy voices, including accents. My kids have heard my special twist on russian, german, spanish, french, and even a little way down south in the bayou cajun. I've also mastered Dr. Seuss tongue twisters! I really don't know how I do it, but it could have something to do with the gallon of Coke I drink before I read those. Either way, my kids are awed and mystified.
So, what are you waiting for? Quit reading my mindless drivel and get yourself a book to read! Get into your comfies, hanker down with a good cup of java, big ole slippers, and grandma's aphgan. I will expect your book report in the morning!
Happy reading.....