So how does one find a church? A place to belong. Fellowship that makes you feel like family. Classes to help you grow. No cliques! Being loved AND included. And most importantly, worship that pleases God and stirs your spirit to grow and flourish. Is there such a thing or does this exist only in fairy tales? I've been told as much. Every church has it's downfalls. It's just deciding what you can handle and what distracts you to the point where your service is hindered beyond repair.
I've read the chapter in Rick Warren's book, Purpose Driven Life about fellowship. I realize that my lack of spiritual maturity is the cause of my own intolerance at church. I don't blame everyone else, although I am a little disappointed by people at times.
I go back to the original reason for finding a church to attend: we needed something. And when we were well-equipped, we served. We even served when we were totally unprepared! We understood the whole giving without receiving thing. But we soon began to feel empty again. Gone were the classes that originally drew us to our third church. And eventually gone was the pastor who taught us that we didn't have to be perfect to be there. We just had to be there.
At the end of our time there,I felt like a car running out of gas. Slowly chugging, desperate to go just a bit longer, sputtering, then abandoned at the side of the road. And while we were told at this very church that we were part of the church family, very few people asked why we left. Funny, if my family missed a few holidays, I think I'd care to ask why. Is " church family" just another word in the dictionary of "Christianese"? We leave. No questions asked, our mailbox gone. Poof! Time to search again. Oh, but we'll always be welcomed back. Really? Why don't i believe that? Because truth speaks and actions back it up. Because in my experience, if people care, they ask questions.
So do we take yet another chance on church or do we avoid being disappointed? What does God say? I know he wants us in fellowship with others on his behalf, so I believe he will answer our earnest prayer to lead us to a church home.
I'm not sure where that will lead, but I have my own criteria in mind! He is probably laughing at me already. While my faith is strong, my ability to act on faith needs some work. If God wants us somewhere, I'm afraid he's going to have to get out the bullhorn to make sure we hear right this time.
Searching....what led YOU to the church you call home?
4 comments:
Hi Jami,
I've been thinking all day about this blog and your question. I have a long story when it comes to churches but after an incredible time of reconciliation ended up back at the church I originally attended. I choose that church initially because it was the denomination I grew up in. I went to other church because it was in the community I lived in. I was hurt there too and took a sabbatical for 6 months before God lead me back to the original church. It was because I really believed in the doctrine we believe in, Biblical based and Reformed. I also appreciate their view on women in leadership (they're for it). I don't always get fed the way I would like but I have a tremendous group of friends.
I don't think you will ever find a perfect church that meets all your needs. I wanted to be in a place that would help me with the MS but which also would create space for me to serve in whatever way I could. Being Biblical based was most important.
I pray that God will lead you to the place for you and that you will find a Christian community to be part of. It's so important for many reasons.
Hi Jami
You are the church and you, like everyone else, will bring to the location of attendance the type of church you are.
There is no perfect place because everyone is being worked on by God. Our God, is by His Spirit, perfecting us in righteousness. John 16:8 And when He is come, He will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment. There is a learning curve because this nurturing from God helps us get from glory to glory, and in that growth there is struggle and the struggle might manifest as some of the things that caused you to leave the last church location. We are basically learning to play the violin in public and often it looks and sounds bad right there in the local assembly. We end up seeing the struggles within the people who assemble in the place we call church. In the same way that we bring all our sick folk under one roof called a hospital. We bring all who are born-again and overcoming different hypocrisies under one roof, called a church. In that place we bring all the spiritual sicknesses in our lives to get healed by the great healer, Christ. That is why we give grace to each other, in Christ, because we are all dealing with something the Lord has put His finger on. Let us say God has just touched a squishy spot that causes us to show who we really are, and in that moment, hopefully there are mature Christians around us to help us get through that particular righteous judgment from God.
I don't know if it is possible to be part of a church without being willing to be worked on by God in public, and at the same time, be willing to be used as a hand extended of God to help the ugly in spirit and the unwashed per say. If we are looking for the Norman Rockwell picture of what we think church is or should be, then there might be a lot of church hopping going on in our lives. We will end up right where the devil likes us to be, on the move and unstable to the point of no longer caring if we do gather with the saints.
I found my church back in 1983. I went to this church because they treated my wife, who is from Central America, real nice, (No, not Utah as an American once seriously asked.) She is from Guatemala and she had a small accent (that is what I tell her.) She found that she was treated so nice and was asked to help in the baby room. I said, "Thank you, Lord, for taking care of my wife," and I started going to the same location. I am the church and I made it a place for others who would like to attend the same location and become the church. We are still going to this location and yes, over the years, there has been numerous reasons to leave; but God planted us there and until He transplants us to another place then the present location is the place we will grow and deal with all the squishy spots He puts his finger on to perfect us according to His word. Eph.4:11 And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; 12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: 13 Till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.
Miss Jami, you seem to me to have a smart spiritual sense about you. You know you and your family need the body of Christ speaking into your lives. You should trust the Holy Spirit who is guiding you at this time to be asking yourself these church questions. Is it not because the Lord knows, you know, it is time to assemble and destroy the works of the enemy.
Father, in the name of Jesus, I ask you Lord to fill Jami and her family with the knowledge of your Holy spirit, so that they may do what You have called them to fulfill in their lives and in your church. Give Jami's family your guidance in finding a place where they will grow because of who is in that location. I ask in Jesus name that the saints would also mature because of the blessing You have made Jami and her family to be in your church. It is your church, Lord, and we thank You for it and we thank you for all that it does to bring all of us into fellowship with You and the ones You love. Amen!
SirNorm and Angela, I'm not sure you can see my comments and I can't figure out how to "reply" to comments without my laptop. Anyway, your words on this post are so helpful. I shared them with my husband and it began a healthy and eye-opening discussion on what we both need and want in a church. It gave us some new perspectives, one of them being, " wow, I can't believe so much spiritual help is coming from people we have never met, and yet speak so directly to our hearts. It's clear that God is using you and for that we are grateful! Thank you for lifting us in prayer and for taking the time to share with us your hard-earned spiritual wisdom. God bless you!
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