Panty Raid on Adams Street

Oh, you're just wondering what this one's about, aren't you? Well, this one's a classic. Here's a story from when we lived on Adams Street in our old house. It was a charming old house, built in 1886, and had little gaps and cracks which sometimes allowed for unwanted "guests" to check in. Here's what happened....

Steve got up early one Saturday morning, with the intention of letting me sleep in while he cared for the girls, who were still little at the time. I knew he'd be down cooking up a great breakfast as he always did on Saturdays, so I snuggled back down to sleep. That lasted about 10 minutes, when I heard a clinking sound coming from my vanity area. I heard it a few times, so I looked over toward where my glass angel sat on the vanity, and it moved! I was sure I saw something brown and fuzzy sitting there, but because I hadn't put my glasses on yet, eveything looked brown and fuzzy. By the time I got my glasses on and looked, it was gone and so was the noise. Of course, I couldn't go back to sleep, so I headed down to the kitchen to tell my husband there was something brown and fuzzy running around our bedroom, knocking over angels. Yeah, I wasn't too confident about that one. Okay, deep breath. "Hey, Honey, I heard a weird noise in our room, so when I looked over, I saw my angel figurine move and I think maybe a chipmunk or something might be up there." Weak smile from me, typical smirk from him. "Uh, okay. Were you fully awake when this chipmunk or something was running around our room?" I couldn't blame him. I had told him many times of weird noises, shadows, maniacs with chainsaws, but something told me this one was for real.
I told him to humor me, and just go check up there. I must have looked pretty pitiful, because he just went up there, no argument at all. Now, I'm sure he laughed all the way up the stairs while rolling his eyes, wondering how I came to be such a bonehead, and why he married me.
A few minutes later, he assured me that his extensive bedroom search yielded nothing. "I checked the closet, under the bed, the windows...there is nothing up there. I promise you." Now, I trust this man with my life, but I still would not go up in the bedroom for the rest of the day. I imagined he walked in there, jumped on the bed a few times, did a little dance, slammed a couple doors, then came back down to eat the bacon.
Now that night, we were watching TV in bed and I didn't hear anything coming from the vanity. I had to admit that maybe I was imagining things and let Steve laugh at me a bit. It was when I turned off the lamp that the action began, and I don't mean that kind of action. We immediately started hearing a clunking noise, which sounded like something pounding from inside a drawer. That was it for me. "I told you!! There's something in here!" Then I flew out of there, shut the door behind me and ran downstairs, leaving him to deal with whatever it was. Serves him right, he should have actually looked when he went up there!
So, I sat there on the couch, listening to some gruesome banging noises coming from our room, and I suddenly had a terrifying thought. What if it was some venomous, vicious critter and it was attacking Steve? No, I didn't go check. He's a big boy and he has life insurance.
It seemed like a long time, but I finally heard him coming down the stairs. There he was, in his underoos, carrying one of my vanity drawers with a board on top of it. I panicked slightly, then asked, "Is there something in there? What is it?" He said, "well, I followed the noises to the drawers and opened each one. When I opened this one, all I saw was a little pink snout, so I hurried up and shut it. I covered it with this board and I'm just going to take it outside."
"A snout?? What on earth has a snout?" I was beyond freaked out. Something with a snout was in my drawer. While I slept in there! Steve had me open the front door, and we both walked out to the front yard, where he dumped the contents of what turned out to be my underwear drawer on the front lawn. Thank God for darkness is all I could think at that point. So, out runs our little unwanted guest, a baby possum, which tore out of the drawer, through my pile of delicates and up the tree in the front yard. We both looked at each other, completely stunned. Did we see what we think we just saw? Are you really out here in your underwear? Is my underwear really all over the front yard? Can anyone see us??
Needless to say, we were in shock over this little panty raider. We laughed like crazy when we told the story to anyone, and it's still fun to tell to this day. We have a theory for how it got in our house. I think I may have actually carried it in in a laundry basket that was outside and full of clean clothes from the clothesline.
I know possums are nasty. One of the ugliest critters around, in fact. However, babies aren't too bad, especially when they're covered in undies!

Stay tuned for "Batman wears pink"......