Anyway, she was telling him about me, and he abruptly said, "now, see, THIS is what makes mad!! She's never done anything to anybody! That's just wrong!" It impressed my mom that he had this emotional reaction. He keeps it close to the vest- all of it. You never know what he's thinking, and when he finally does--listen.
His 50th birthday was a few days ago so I sent him a text. He replied back that he felt bad about my condition and added, " I guess we lived our lives too clean"! That statement really resonated with me over the last few days.
Yeah, I don't drink, I don't do drugs, I don't smoke, I don't even curse! I'm no Pollyanna, but I'm pretty clean I guess! But does that exempt a person from illness? Tragedy? Death? Of course not! When you are a human, you are susceptible to lots of bad things because we live in a world where bad things lurk. Bad people use free will. Illness destroys.
But that is worldly, fleshy thinking. And that kind of thinking only magnifies worldly problems.
If I choose to say, yes, I have seizures, but God is helping me. He will use this for good. My good, someone else's good, His purpose...then seizures don't seem so sinister anymore.
If I chose to think I was being punished or harmed or doomed or limited, then what would that make me? A victim. And a victim of evil to boot.
No, Easter just reminded me that God loved me ( and you) so much that he gave the life of his son so I could live. Not live with fear of death, but to live with the promise of eternal life!
His son didn't suffer so I could suffer. He suffered so I wouldn't have to.
Why me, my brother? Because though God did not sicken me, he will be magnified through my praise and adoration of Him as I heal. Yes, I will heal! And while I wait, I will show God's grace and amplify his provision. This is what he desires! That one of His would persevere under pressure and come out stronger than before. It's why we needed the cross, and it's why we thank him for it daily.
Why NOT me?
1 comment:
Good word sister! Rev 12:11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.
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